Quantum Coffee Mug Altar: The Day an 8 Year Old Entered Consciousness

This coffee mug represents the day everything changed for me.

I was eight years old, and this was one of the first judo tournaments that I was actually winning a little. There was this one kid there from Japan. He was very focused and would stare forward right through me when I would say hi or try to make eye contact. He would focus only on the match, if you would try to engage he would look through you like you were nothing but a chain link fence.

I admit, I wasn't that interesting. My only concern was trying anything I could to get more sugar in my body and inhale the helium balloons because science at that age is silly and just as fun as winning a regional judo tournament. The Japanese kid was only focused on one thing, and my high-pitched helium voice didn't even phase him. 

At that age, I was very imaginative and whimsical but still angry and edgy because, no matter what, I had deep desires to be in a nuclear accident, where I would be exposed to Gamma rays and become the Incredible Hulk. Sure, I was in the nerdy "gifted" programs and loved to read, but I also wished my rage had a place to go, and that place was through every wall in every town with a corrupt sheriff.

I had won my first couple of matches that day by being scrappy. They let me compete, and although I was younger than the other kids in my division, I was used to dealing with larger and more athletic people, aka bullies, but back in the 80s, those kids were just the kids in your neighborhood. That's who you had to hang out with, so deal with it. Punch a nose, and they punch your nose. Then we all cry, and that's how you make friends. The only way to get beat up worse than just being the new kid or the weird kid would be if your parents called their parents and tried to schedule a play date. Then, you and your entire family will get picked on.

Being overpowered and outclassed has been a theme in my life. I will fight you if I have to, no problemo. Especially if you are the only thing standing between me and a peaceful moment of journaling and making art. So let's get this over with so I can boil some water for tea, and you can put some ice on your face.

That Japanese kid, though.

I would try to say hi, and he would just stare forward. Nothing broke his focus—until they called his name, which was right after they had called mine, fun fact. We were in the semi-finals.

We stood on our lines, bowed to each other, and let me tell you about judo real quick.

You are just trying to get one perfect point.

If you get the perfect throw or point, it means that in battle, the fight will be over because you are in complete control of the other person. There are smaller half and quarter points, but if you hear the word "Ippon!" The fight is over.

So the referee says, "Hajime," which is the best word to start anything you're stoked about. Seriously, it's pronounced ha -ji- may! Try it, "Hajime!"

So we grabbed onto each other, and I may have been a bit "willy nilly" or unprepared for the wave of focused execution of technique that was about to be hand delivered to me on that day. Because the time between the "Hajime" and the "Ippon" was about as long as it takes to say "Hajime!"

It was like his hands were magic wands, and his magic power was that anything he touched just appeared on the ground, lying on their backs.

The word judo is two words. "Ju" means "gentle," and "do" means "way."

When these arts are done right, you will feel nothing. You just wind up on the ground. Oh, and I didn't even feel myself hit the ground. It was that gentle. 

We bowed, and they raised his arm in the air. I was in a confused limbo, wondering if the match had started yet or if I was just in a sugar crash. Regardless, I did not contest my loss, and he probably went off to win the tournament. However, I would not know because I just went over to some weird arts and crafts booth and dealt with the pain of loss like any other 8-year-old. I decorated a custom coffee mug.

But that day changed me.

That kid transmitted a focus in my training and life that I will never take for granted. I started winning after that. I started training with a new focus and intention. My imagination was practical and optimistic. I knew that there were people who were at a level that I couldn't even imagine, and I wanted to find them and experience that new level.

Today, I still keep that intention and remind myself of the words Ju-do. We are seeking the perfect execution of being so gentle it is uncontested and as powerful as an ocean wave with ourselves and others. So, if you feel threatened or challenged, can you meet that energy with gentle power? Do you even know what the hell I mean? Because I am certain that I don't. I meet new levels that I never knew could exist daily. Throw away your arrogance and admit that there is more unknown than known. It will probably take more than your lifetime, so don't beat yourself up if you get beat up along the way. 

If you were to meet any elite artist or practitioner, the difference between the worst elite athlete and the best amateur is often so great that we can't even understand. That day widened my view to accept that there is energy and skill that my imagination cannot yet realize, so I need to be brave enough to seek it and stand in front of it. Then, let it transmit a little wisdom right into my bones.

I used to think that spastic energy and excitement were how you got good at something. We often confuse spectacle and flailing for power. That's what movies, social media, and marketing rely on—spectacle, flames, drama, and distraction from a life that spends a lot of time having tantrums. Focus and subtlety are perhaps the most elite and exclusive things you can pursue and the hardest to sell.

That excited "berzerker" type of energy is fine if you are competing against the same energy; you both can have your Haka battle and slap yourselves, get pumped, and stick your eyeballs out as far as your tongues all day, but when you meet a focused decision-maker with strategy and listening skills. There is no competition, just Ippon! Now you can go make your stupid mug.